I have been putting off writing this, several times I have wanted to, but not had the strength to put pen to paper...........
As i write now, it is still difficult, still raw, four years on. How could I find the finesse to do this??????
For these are my memories, in memory of a Mother who was as true to her word as she was to herself. It takes a very special person to just love and only love and be all about the love for her family.
She was everything good in myself and everything good in her..........
Her love came from her essence always. Her love was like a river, always flowing, always changing, but yet, forever remaining the same. Just like the rock of that very river bed, always the same, always grounded.
She was perfect, so perfect was she, it struck me upon her death, that she had always been in her life the epitome of love.
For I was chosen, she always told me I was special and that 'Mum and Dad' was there from the beginning to just love and care for me through each of their hearts.
My Mother, in her life had been the most loving, calm, unselfish person I ever had the pleasure to know. She was loving, yet independent, allowing herself small pockets of her own space. Small pockets she could only afford to give herself, pockets of her own independent time.
She needed these small time pockets in order to give even more love, it revitalised her being.
As her family of three girls became older, her small time pockets expanded into larger time pockets.
She kept the love for us all, loving her family to perfection. She placed my heart inside of herself, then upon her death gave me it back, so that I could continue to love in the same vein as she had always loved in her life.
The night of her death, she ripped her oxygen mask off and said to me "I LOVE YOU" I will treasure this moment all of my life.
Love truly was the way for my Mother and it certainly will be my way all of my life.
Any woman can be a Mother but it takes an extremely special type of woman to be a MOTHER.
My Mother loved, because she loved without control, giving so much unconditional love. Because of this my Father fell deeply in love with her from the very first moment they met. They both remained in love with each other, throughout a long and extremely happy marriage, in this pairing, it truly was till death do us part.
They found 'TRUE LOVE' within each other and within themselves. Their legacy was to be in love, remain, love to love, to continue to love.
The above painting is IN TOTAL DEDICATION AND IN TREASURED WONDERFUL MEMORIES OF MY EXTREMELY LOVING MOTHER.........